/c/talesfromthecrypticlemmy@lemmy.world

!talesfromthecrypticlemmy@lemmy.world

So, I do a lot of writing (mystery solved for people wondering how I can reply so fast and so much on Lemmy!) and decided to create a fun little community, Tales from the Cryptic Lemmy.

Mostly a showcase for “crappy” pulp writers like myself. I figured I’d leave the good writing for the better communities out there.

I’m hoping the new community will be all about celebrating and participating in crappy pulp horror writing, where people can just have fun with it and not worry about perfection. It’s all about embracing the weird, over-the-top, and messy, without taking ourselves too seriously.

My first story for this new community is The Man Who Hunted Sea Lions on Lemmy.

Inspired by the drama I stirred up in a politics community, where now everyone seems convinced I’m some Russian troll mining “Russian bitcoinz” and spreading propaganda on Lemmy. Why? Because I dared to support voting third party. And wow, some of them took it personally—parody accounts, stalking, and even posting stats on how much I comment. Hateful DMs, weird comments—the works. Oy!

Anyway, I learned a new term: “sealioning.” Never heard of it before Lemmy, but after asking what it meant (several times), I got banned from that community for three days… for sealioning! Still not sure how my posts fit that, but whatever—it gave me the idea for a fun little story in my new community. So, it worked out!

I’ll keep cranking out and posting stories there, and maybe—just maybe—others will join in on the madness!

And if not? No sweat. I’ll keep pumping out these craptacular tales, hurling them into the endless void of cyberspace, where they’ll float like ghosts in the dead ether, waiting for someone, somewhere, to stumble upon them. :)

  • PhilipTheBucket@ponder.catEnglish
    91·
    16 days ago

    Up ahead, a sudden flash of yellow light flared, then vanished, like a door had been cracked open and slammed shut in an instant. The man froze, a wave of panic clawing at him. He could turn back now, leave this cursed place behind, head home where everything was safe and familiar. Back to his room in his mom’s house. Back to his A.I. girlfriend. Back to his keyboard.

    No! He hadn’t come this far to turn in this tracks and run like a kid trapped in a cemetery at night. There was no turning back. That fucking troll, Universal Monk must pay for his treachery!

    Let me guess: He was thwarted in his quest like a Scooby-Doo villain, and the cool Universal Monk showed him up, and everyone clapped.

    I’m impolite to you because you are trolling. Why would I be friendly to that? You reacted to the community’s disapproval and requests for you to stop what you were doing by doubling down and adopting a gleeful serial-killer energy in all your interactions with them, while still posting 10-15 copies a day of more or less the exact same unwanted story. People aren’t being mean to you because they dislike you, they’re reacting to you being toxic and disrespectful directly to their face, and ignoring what they in all kinds of fashions have been telling you they would like the community to be.

    I’m completely serious that I’m concerned about you. Excluding sleep and working, you’ve been averaging posting something on Lemmy every 9 minutes, every single hour of every single day for 2 months. You could have been accomplishing any number of projects with that, something you could be really proud of. Instead you’ve made it your mission to turn as many people as you possibly can, in this one weird little corner of the internet, into enemies for yourself. I don’t know what would make you do that.

    Nobody here set out to be unfriendly to you on purpose, because of who you are, or anything like that. They’re reacting to what you are doing to them. Working hard to make everyone turn against you is going to turn people against you.

    • Socialist Mormon Satanist@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      314·
      16 days ago

      Let me guess: He was thwarted in his quest like a Scooby-Doo villain, and the cool Universal Monk showed him up, and everyone clapped.

      Oh man, you didn’t even read it? I mean there’s recipe sharing, some singing, some laughs. I don’t wanna spoil it for you, but it does seem like a fun time had by all. Well, almost all. But you gotta admit, I do get accused of “main character syndrome” every day, so it really had to lead to a story sooner are later, right?

      You reacted to the community’s disapproval and requests for you to stop

      The mods allow me to keep posting there, so I’ll keep posting there. In fact, posting some stuff there this morning!

      doubling down and adopting a gleeful serial-killer energy

      You mean, being friendly. Meh, easy to get confused about the two, I guess. But I do like your wording. Hey, are you a pulp-writer too?! Friend, you gotta submit something to the Tales from the Cryptic Lemmy community! Come on, do it! I can see that I’ve inspired some passion in you!

      I’m completely serious that I’m concerned about you.

      See that? I knew we were on the verge of being friends. I can feel it now—a friendship bubbling up from the depths like a long-buried secret, just waiting to explode! You’ve been holding it back, afraid to let it out, but guess what? It’s happening! You can’t stop it now. Hooray!

      Excluding sleep and working, you’ve been averaging posting something on Lemmy every 9 minutes, every single hour of every single day for 2 months.

      Prolific, right? Ya know, I’ve always felt a connection to those million-word-a-year men; the old pulp writers. They cranked out stories and words nonstop, and now here I am, doing the same! Just as underappreciated in my time as they were in theirs, but hey, quantity over quality, right?! I sorta feel like I’m living my dream right now. And to see you so worked up and passionate about what I’m doing! Thank you for this shout-out!

      You could have been accomplishing any number of projects with that, something you could be really proud of

      But I am proud of my work on Lemmy. Thank you for your kind words. I’ve written two more stories that I’m posting today and I’m posting some more articles today, so be sure to update your stats about me. Thanks, friend! :)