Nature’s Rizla.

I’m a failed virgin

I thought you were a really successful virgin?

Check out Platypus’s post history. He/she is just looking to wallow in self-pity.

So, still not prepared to do anything to make your life better, then. Gotcha.

Oh, you again! Still complaining about your life but not prepared to do anything to make it better?

If only the tram could have kind of scooped up the morels and taken them on board… but there wasn’t mush room inside!

Pffft. Hendo’s is better.

Hold my flashbang, I’m going in!

I think it’s a ‘q’.

Tommy Cooper. A bit old school these days but a funny guy. He specialised in doing magic tricks badly for comedic effect, so when he died people really thought it was part of the show.

Here’s a classic: Spoon jar jar spoon.

So you’re trying sweet fuck all and that’s not working out for you. What’s your Plan B? Just bitching about it?

You’re the one missing the point. You can make your life better. You are choosing not to. Your loss.

Ah, so all the stuff you do have is ‘nothing’.

Stop deflecting and do some work.

I thought they were having a stroke.

Incoming!

This is the way, the truth, and the light. If it’s not rare, you have it because why wouldn’t you.

Inventory facism is so early 1980s. It’s a hold-out from the whole adversarial GM shite. It’s much more fun for players (and GMs) to assume the characters are competent and moderately well equiped unless scarcity is the point of the adventure. Let your players have access to their skills / magic / specials and play to the best of their characters’ abilities!

Wait, what? When I see PI I think Private Investigator. Is this something else?

Came back to upvote after closing the tab and subsequently realising the quality of this comment.

Why, I otter…!

when you have literally NOTHING in your life

Clearly not you then. You don’t appear to be dying from starvation, cold, or conflict. You’re articulate and capable of writing with perfectly acceptable spelling and grammar. You have access to the internet. You’re way ahead of 90% of humanity. Check that privilege!

Get off your self-pity cloud and do something. Learn some new skills - there’s plenty of free courses out there. Improve yourself. Learn skills, earn money, use money to better your situation. Stop blaming the world, it owes you nothing. You, and only you, are responsible for your happiness.