Stepos Venzny

I’m playing Dragon’s Dogma II, taking the suspended tram into Bahkbattal or however you spell it. One of my pawns failed to make it into the basket before it started moving but they’re not a ranged fighter so they’re no use in driving off harpies anyways and I don’t bother turning back since I know from previous antics that they tend to find a way back to you.

A few minutes into the trip, dangling precariously in a rickety wooden contraption over a canyon, I hear the cry of a griffin. I spot it over the horizon, its eyes locked with mine. I am forced to watch helplessly as it approaches, drawing an arrow as if it could accomplish anything. The griffin slams into my tram, shattering it instantly and dropping the three of us to our doom.

That pawn that didn’t make it on the tram catches me in a bridal carry and sets me gently down on my feet, completely unharmed.

That’s why the game’s fast travel systems are made to discourage you from using them, because adventures don’t happen during loading screens.

Scratching an itch feels good even when it doesn’t actually go away. I’ll take that over hiccups since they’re nothing but downside.