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Joined 11 months ago
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Cake day: December 13th, 2023

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  • That grammar evolves naturally, like species do, so any rules we find for the categorization of either should reflect reality, not try to dictate it.

    For example, I just started that bit with a clause, which means it’s a fragment, not a sentence. I still put a period at the end of it and started it without any lead in, which is “wrong,” but it’s more that the rule is wrong, because what I wrote plays the role of a sentence in this case.


  • Can I try to gently press that a little?

    I would feel awful if I found out I had been enabling someone’s alcoholism, especially if they only allowed it because they trusted me and I offered them drinks. I have ADHD and autism, so I understand making yourself hard and fast rules to avoid having to make your own self control (I’m not saying that’s definitely what you’re doing).

    Could you perhaps try gradually increasing the rules one by one so that in the end there’s basically no scenario in which you drink? I’m talking: a trusted person offers it to you; it’s a weekend; it’s nice weather out; your whole house is clean; you’ve got extra cash; you ate healthy that day; you are already in a good mood; your beloved (hopefully incapable, for this situation) sports team has won; you talked to two relatives that day, etc. I’m not a therapist, but that works for me. The problem is when I mess up- my rules are great for keeping me out of trouble, but they make me spiral if/when I do break them. You might have to figure out a combination of zero tolerance for “mistakes” and allowing yourself to make actual mistakes without spiraling.