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Joined 9 months ago
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Cake day: February 1st, 2024

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  • I’m traaaaaaaaaaans! Started estradiol and spironolactone last week. They say it takes like 10 days to a month to notice things, and so far I haven’t seen a reduction in sex drive or alertness beyond my usual ebb and flow. Hair loss hasn’t changed either, but my facial and body hair is thinner and softer, improving the feeling after a shave. Finasteride or dutasteride would do the same thing, but I’m hoping for eventual total feminization if possible. (I’m fine with having a dick, but I’m a bottom so I don’t need it.)

    I’m fascinated with women’s fashion, and my makeup collection now fills a purse. Between Goodwill and Amazon I’ve accumulated a fairly complete wardrobe. It’s mostly slutty stuff of course, and it’s always slightly disappointing that I don’t yet have titties to fill the tops. I really dig the schoolgirl look. A cosplay set I bought comes with a microskirt that feels like a 26" non-elastic waist (I’m 30", maybe women’s size 5 or 6) so the thing rides really high and exposes my junk. UwU I’ll be replacing it with a better fit when I go out in public. Hoping to get groped by a stranger on Halloween or something.



  • They aren’t, but chasing down websites in other languages is a pain in the ass. The Japanese see basically all non-Japanese people as copyright infringers. I’ve downloaded JAV that’s bookended and watermarked with Chinese ads because the Chinese have the gall to do that, not the Japanese who probably see it as an annoyance and primarily target the domestic Japanese market anyways.



  • Met a fellow 30something crossdresser and free software guy on Hinge. It seemed like a great fit. We met for coffee and talked for a few hours, then he told me he wasn’t gay and didn’t want to meet me again. For fuck’s sake. My ass won’t destroy itself. 🥵😭

    Now that I’ve scrolled through 1000+ profiles and determined that they aren’t gay enough for me (I don’t really go for masc/closeted/straight-looking people and I try to limit the age range to 25-40s) I really need to figure out what the fuck part of this community I’m overlooking or not understanding. I’m willing to drop out of college and move for the right relationship. Ever since I became a gay femboy, things have gotten harder.




  • I know. I’m privacy conscious and have software dev and IT training. I’m a lot better than most zoomers in that regard. I’m just hoping that my niche actually exists in the real world and isn’t purely a rhetorical construct invented to get underage queers to join discord servers and talk about identity issues. I would hope glowies have better things to do than infiltrate the gay community. I would also hope that the liminal space of looking like a girl but not identifying as one is a common shared experience. My litmus test is age, so the more 40something and 50something femboys and sissies I see, the more secure I am in the label’s legitimacy. Do girly boys hold a special place in your heart?


  • My sexy fun for the year seemed to start and end in July. It seems I can’t get much, but that doesn’t stop me from trying. I brought a gay friend to a BDSM group a couple days ago, and he politely observed and listened to people talk. Very quiet and non-confrontational sort of guy. I don’t think he’s interested in me.

    I’ve also taken an interest in niche dating sites - made an account on Duolicious and managed to make contact with a metrosexual 24-year-old, but he’s so incredibly shy and reserved that I don’t think it’s going anywhere. I also found a site called Sissy Island, but they’re having server errors. If I could date only in femboy and sissy circles, especially if the crowd skews more to Gen Y, I couldn’t ask for more. My sexuality is abnormal, and I guess I’m going against the grain by avoiding people I’m not attracted to, since the standard for my generation seems to be having no standards.



  • Where indeed? I’m pansexual, currently leaning more gay, nb-presenting male with a thin frame. If I had no standards, I could probably find some bear in the area. Scruff is another gay app, and I managed to meet someone through that who looks like my type but isn’t much of a top and didn’t want to meet again. I’m also on a BDSM-focused gay site called Recon, where I’ve been engaged in a multi-month ongoing conversation with this shy pantyhose fetishist who eventually wants to try things. I avoid Grindr because I’m not looking for disposable experiences.